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Why I wouldn't love to be an Oscar Meyer Wiener.

Being eaten it doesn't sound like a bad thing (in fact I know of an erotic novel entitled Lunch), until you realize that if you were an O.M.W. you would cease to exist afterwards. An O.M.W. has no sexual organs at all. Missing this part of my life might seem like a small thing but until you realize that along with no orgasm you are born ( so to speak) into this world barren.

Why would I ever want to be a molded piece of assorted meat that could never see, smell, taste ( to me, might taste good to others), hear, or feel anyhting, no thoughts, no desires, no anything. It's like living a life as a door knob except knowing you will eventually you will be thrown away in disgust or eaten.

Ultimately knowing that someday I could get covered in mustard, ketchup and relish and then right as I reached the mouth I was dropped on the ground and then stepped on as they went to replace me with another oscar meyer weiner sickens me to the very essence on my being.